How to Safely Reject Unwanted Advances



Say no firmly.,
Lie if you need to.,
Don’t give them any of your information.,
Get away.,
Stay calm.,
Make a report.

As long as it feels reasonably safe, say no immediately. Do not smile, apologize, or say maybe. If you don’t want someone, don’t give them anything. Just say something like “No, I’m not interested.”Do not allow anyone you don’t like to touch you or stand close to you.
Step back if they are too close to you.
Turn away if they are taking too long to leave you alone.
For instance, if you are at a party, you might say “No, I’m not interested,” then turn to your friend and suggest going to another room.;
, If you are alone and the person hitting on you threatens you or makes you feel too uncomfortable to say no, tell them a quick lie that will let you escape.

You can say you need to use a bathroom, or that you forgot something in your car, or that you need to make a quick call.
Get into a public place and get help.
Put walls between yourself and the aggressor as quickly as you can. Unstable or inebriated people sometimes attack even in public.

, Don’t give them your name, information about your job, where you live, where you’re going next, or anything else. If you aren’t sure yet if someone is hitting on you or bothering you, just ask “why?” instead of answering the questions, and then decided if you are being advanced upon.Explain that you are not interested instead of answering questions.
If you are told, “It was just a compliment, I just want to talk to you. What do you do for work?” resist the urge to answer the question. Instead, say “I am talking with my friends right now” or “I am not interested in continuing this conversation.”

, Once someone has made you nervous, put space between yourself and them. If they don’t leave you alone, walk away. Leave as long as you can leave safely without being followed. Leave with friends if you can. If you feel relatively safe, you can stick around, but don’t agree to sit with or stand near the aggressor.

Try going into another room, leaving a bar or party (with friends), or moving to sit at the bar instead of at a table so that the bartender can watch out for you.

, If you yell at them, they may try to hurt you.Be as cool and firm as you can. Take deep breaths if you feel yourself losing your temper or getting frightened. Take special care to stay calm if you are alone, as you are more likely to be violently attacked.

If you are in public, an abuser may try to upset you in order to discredit you. Stay calm and make sure to let other people know what’s going on.

, Tell somebody so that they can look out for you. If you are at a bar, tell your friends. If someone is making you uncomfortable, tell a bouncer or bartender exactly what happened so that they can keep an eye out for you and eject the person if needed.

If it happens in the street, tell the people you can see what happened. If you were threatened, report the incident to the police.

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