How to Get Someone out of Your Head



Stay calm.,
Take action early on.,
Know that it isn’t about you.,
Do your research.,
Gain allies whenever possible.,
Keep a record.,
Avoid them as much as possible.,
Get a supervisor, teacher, or other authority figure involved.,
Take care of yourself.

Bullies love a reaction, and they particularly love an emotional reaction.

As soon as they know they’re getting to you, they’re going to keep digging in deeper.
If you must react to the bully at all, do so calmly and coolly. Being the calm one not only makes the bully look immature, it shifts the power dynamic to make you the powerful one–a state of affairs that bullies hate., Don’t allow the situation to escalate before taking measures to manage it. #*The longer a bad situation goes unchecked, the more negatively it will impact you and the more powerful and entitled the bully will feel., The bully’s issue is entirely their own–it isn’t about you, it’s about their weaknesses and insecurities.

Don’t ever allow the bully to convince you that you brought this on yourself. They alone are responsible for their own behavioral choices.

, Look into the types of bullying behavior, what motivates a bully, and how to understand bully.

Many bullies are victims of violence themselves and are acting out. Knowing this can help you have some compassion as well as help you better understand the true power dynamic between the two of you..

, Build a support network: the more people you have on your side who are willing to support you, the harder you’ll be to target.

Having allies will also help you feel confident and supported, two characteristics that bullies find very defeating.

, Write down the time, place, and a description of each encounter in case you need to bring a formal or informal complaint against them.

Having specific times, places, and descriptions of your encounters with this person will make it very difficult for them to deny the truth of what you’re saying or to try to shift the blame onto you.

, The less you see them, the fewer opportunities they’ll have to manipulate you.Not having opportunities to bully or otherwise manipulate you will leave a bully bored and they’ll begin searching for a more gratifying target.

, If the problem can’t be solved by simply ignoring or avoiding the bully, it’s time to get someone with authority involved.

If you’ve been keeping a record of the events–which is recommended–show the other person your records, describe the bully’s behavior to them, and explain how that behavior impacts you., Find healthy ways to vent your emotions, whether it’s working out, doing yoga, or writing in a journal. It’s important that you spend time caring for yourself rather than caring about what the bully is saying or thinking.

If the bullying is a significant source of stress, consider talking with a therapist to help you manage the situation..

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