How to Find Out if You Are Infatuated



See the truth about your differences.,
Find information about how he/she feels about you.,
Discover most everything about the other person.,
Evaluate the way this person fits into your life.,
Decide whether to cut the relationship off or try to make it work.,
Think about how long it has been.

Often you will start to fall out of this stage of infatuation once you have gone through all of the possibilities of planning a life together and notice the reality of the situation. For example, you know that you want kids and the other person does not want kids. Maybe you thought that you could work through this, but as time goes on you start to see how much more important this is to you than you thought.

The things you realize about the person after the infatuation period is over are not always incompatible with who you are or your life. For example, you may realize that even though at first you didn’t think that her family living in Hawaii would be a challenge, that it is a real challenge. However, the challenge is worth it to you.

, Once you have enough data to know whether or not the person you are infatuated with really loves you or does not love you, you will begin to leave the infatuation stage. Over time, even the most infatuated person will start to pick up on the patterns that they are going through with love/unrequited love. This accumulated experience will help the infatuation period come to an end.

, If you have spent a lot of time together, had enough talks, and done enough things together that you finally feel like you really know him/her, you will likely be coming to the end of your infatuation. Based on what you see, does this person seem like a person who would be well suited for you and who you would be good for?

, After infatuation, couples can successfully transition into long term, loving, and committed relationships. However, the opposite is also possible. It is possible that you were with someone who was not right for you in the long run, but you were unable to see that because of your feelings of infatuation.

Does this person share the same interests, goals, values and lifestyle that you do?
Does this person bring out the good side in you?
Or was the relationship all about the chemistry that you shared?

, Based on your knowledge, decide whether this relationship is a good choice for your life. If you decide that you want to be with this person, move forward and work to build communication, compassion and work into your relationship so that it lasts. If you decide that this relationship is not right for you, you should break up.

, Infatuation lasts between 18 months and three years, typically. Infatuation does not generally last longer than that unless it is prolonged by a long-distance relationship or deep insecurity in the person who is infatuated. Off again/on again relationships can also cause the infatuation period to go on for a longer time.

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