How to Decide Whether to Break Up or Not Using a Broken Heart Exercise



Draw a broken heart on a piece of paper.,
Think of all the things you like about this person.,
Think of the bad things about this person.,
Look at how many stitches or other items you have left after going through the list of likes and dislikes.,
Realize that this is just a fun test, not a foolproof method of guessing what is best.

, For every one thing you like, draw something to patch the broken heart back together (stitches, Band-Aids™, arrows, safety pins, etc.).

, For example, what are the reasons why you want to break up with this person? For every one bad thing, erase one of the items you drew that were keeping the heart together.

, Analyze the result. At a rough guess, if you have:

0 to 2 stitches left – it’s quite possible that you’re already walking away from the relationship and patching it together isn’t going to work so well.
3 to 5 stitches left – the relationship is quite possibly okay, perhaps average and in need of some enlivening but maybe keep trying a little bit longer.
6-infinity stitches left – the relationship is great and you are possibly dealing with other competing reasons that have encouraged you to consider dumping this person. In this case, perhaps think about the bigger picture that has led you to question the value of this relationship in your life at this time.

, It may be that the heart still hangs together quite well but you still feel that it’s just not worth the effort anymore. Or, perhaps the threads are all broken but a part of you is screaming to give it another try. At this point, just use the exercise as one way to inform yourself of your real feelings and realize that the decision is one you still need to make by considering everything about the relationship and your life’s trajectory.

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