How to Deal with an Autistic Guy Who Has a Crush On You



Realize that usual flirting techniques may not work.,
Be direct with him.,
Ask about his special interests.,
Give him opportunities to help you.,
Admit your crush, when the time feels right.,
Ask him out.,
Do not rely completely on autism stereotypes.,
Be clear about your feelings along the way.,
Love him for who he is, autism and all.

Meeting his eyes and smiling across a room won’t work on a guy who feels uncomfortable with eye contact and doesn’t usually notice subtle smiles.

However, he’ll probably pay extra attention to your face, since he has a crush on you, and spend extra energy analyzing your expressions. This means that he’ll be more likely to pick up on subtle cues, but he may misinterpret them also.;
, For example, a neurotypical guy might pick up that “There’s this really cute guy I like…” might mean him, but an autistic guy is less likely to realize that you aren’t talking about someone else. Try to avoid signals that could be misinterpreted.

You don’t have to walk up to him and flat-out announce “I like you.” Instead, use the more obvious flirting tactics in your repertoire, and clearly communicate through your words and body language that you’re interested. Remember, not everyone likes to be touched.
It’s fine to err on the side of forwardness. Many autistic people are sincere and straightforward, and they enjoy it when people are clear about what they want.

, Many autistic people love to talk about their special interests, and are happy to teach you or discuss back and forth. If you let him know that you’re interested, he’ll stay interested.

, One of the positive traits of some autistic people is a heightened sense of social responsibility, or the desire to help others and fix problems. Open up to him and allow him to help you navigate your problems. It will bring you closer together.

, Expect him to get excited, and probably admit he likes you too. If he gets flustered, don’t worry; he just needs time to put into words what he wants to say.

There is a slight chance that he’ll panic or overreact. If so, it’s probably because he doesn’t know what to do (not that he doesn’t like you). Give him time.

, Autistic people often have trouble initiating conversations. Instead of gauging his interest by how much he initiates, consider how much he reciprocates. If he’s happy when you ask him out, that means he’s definitely into you.

, Autistic people are an incredibly diverse group (just like non-autistic people), and popular perceptions often aren’t particularly accurate. Get to know him as an individual, and don’t rely on stereotypes.

, Mixed signals are confusing in general, but even more so for autistic people. If you have a schedule conflict, tell him it’s a schedule conflict, and ask to reschedule the date. If you’re upset, tell him that you’re upset, and why. This will help him respond to you better.

, That is the greatest gift you can give an autistic person.

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