Identify your feelings and their source.,
Root out fixation.,
Write a journal.,
Allow yourself to feel your feelings.,
Take a brief break to regain composure.,
Tell your crush.,
Coach yourself through difficult moments.,
This can help you figure out whether or not your feelings are a passing fancy or something more serious. It will also help you talk yourself through your feelings when you feel them. Is this infatuation? Lust? When you feel a warm blush start to spread across your face or a similar feeling, acknowledge the emotion, and positively talk yourself through it.”I’m just nervous because I think he’s cute. I’ve been around other cute boys and it’s no big deal. I’m going to be OK.”
“I know that I sometimes get anxious around him. But that’s alright; people sometimes get anxious around crushes. I’m going to do my best anyway.”;
, Fixation occurs when you have an unhealthy obsession about the person that you like and are unable to see them as an imperfect human being.When you are too fixated on a crush, it can put you in a situation in which you can be taken advantage.
Beat fixation by first recognizing and acknowledging it and then restoring perspective by listening all the positive and negative points.If you have difficulty doing this, talk with a trusted adult and ask them to help you.
, Not only will writing a journal help you be physically healthier, it is also a safe place for you to vent your emotions.Writing a journal will also give you the opportunity to clarify your thoughts and come to a deeper understanding of yourself, which could lead to you feeling more grounded when you run into that special someone.
, It can be easy for you to feel embarrassed around the person you like, and this is completely natural.When you feel embarrassed or self-conscious, you might be tempted to hide your feelings, or to ignore them, which can lead you to feeling even less in control around your potential romantic partner.
, When you are with others or in a situation where it isn’t appropriate for you to express your feelings, you might be able to restore emotional control by removing yourself from the situation briefly. Simply excuse yourself and return when you feel better. Some ways to exit a social situation gracefully:
Excuse yourself to the restroom.
Tell your friends you need to step outside for some air.
Explain that you are feeling restless and have decided to take a short walk.
, This may seem like the last thing in the world that you want to do, but talking with the person you like about your feelings will get rid of the uncertainty that is amplifying your uneasiness.Try to use soft language, as coming on too strong might make your crush uncomfortable.
When talking with your crush, instead of saying, “I love you,” it may be best to say something like: “I’ve been noticing lately that I really enjoy your company and I always have so much fun with you, so I was thinking if you’re up for it we could go to a movie?”
, There are going to be times when you feel especially self-conscious, whether because of circumstance or personal factors, and when this happens use your internal voice to guide yourself through the situation. Remind yourself that this is only a feeling, one that you’ll likely have again if you haven’t already, and tell yourself in encouraging words how you will proceed. An example you might consider:
“Alright. I’m really nervous, but that’s OK. I’ve been nervous around guys I like before. I know I can get this work done, all I have to do is focus. So I’m going to turn my attention to this for a while, and I can think about him later.”
, When strong feelings threaten to overwhelm you, it is natural to respond unconsciously by taking shallow breathes. To improve your breathing, for a few breathes try to pay attention only to your inhale and exhale. This will restore your conscious attention to your body and its need for full, relaxed breathing.