How to Be Confident Around Your Crush

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Flirt a little to test the waters.,
Spend a little time with each other before you make any decisions.,
Be direct with your intentions, but keep things casual.,
Don’t put too much weight in your crush’s reply.

Flirting is a great way to judge whether your crush is reciprocating your feelings. There are many different ways to flirt. For example, you can try gently teasing your crush about a mistake, as long as you keep things good-natured. You might also try delivering a suave compliment or making a subtle innuendo while you’re talking with each other. Touch is also a good idea — try reaching out and touching your crush’s shoulder when s/he says something that makes you laugh, for instance. If your crush goes along with your flirting or returns it, this is a good sign.

See our flirting article for many more tips.

, Crushes aren’t always logical. If you’re captivated by someone’s looks and confidence, you may get a crush for this person before you have a good idea of who this person is. You don’t want to make a move on someone only to find out later that you’re not actually attracted to this person, so try to spend at least a little time together (alone or in groups) before you take the plunge.

If you’re nervous about spending casual time with your crush, pick activities that you know you’re good at. Your natural confidence will make it easier to keep your cool while you’re interacting. For example, if you’re good at tennis, you might challenge your crush to a few friendly volleys.

, No matter how confident you are, asking a crush out can cause some major butterflies. A good way to “defuse” the situation is to make your request a casual one. This takes some of the pressure off — your crush isn’t deciding whether to express his or her undying love for you, just deciding whether to spend a little time together.

You don’t even have to bring up the idea of romance yet. For instance, you might simply ask your crush, “Hey, do you want to go get some Mexican food after school?” If you hit things off on your first hang-out session, then you can start hinting that you’d like to be more than friends.

, Crushes aren’t the end of the world. Try not to let yourself get too invested in the outcome of asking your crush out. For one, a “no” may have nothing to do with you — there may simply be other commitments that make romance impossible. More important, though, is the fact that one person’s opinion of you doesn’t matter. Crushes come and go, so don’t let one determine how you feel about yourself.

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